26.1.10

Teaser Tuesday


This is the beginning of my untitled SNI.

Store-fronts and houses have long since morphed into tall, skeletal trees, that look like brittle bones in the pale sunlight. I won't mention it to my brother, but I have a feeling we've been driving around in circles. If I had a quarter for every time the car drifted pass the lake, I would be a very rich woman.

We were obviously lost, but Allan was just like every other member of his species. He was hell-bent on finding his way back onto the main road, without any help. Which meant no maps, and no stopping to ask for directions.

"You must really like that giant rock," I said, turning so that I was facing him. His eyes never left the road, but I could see the frustration boiling deep within them.

"Why do you say that?" he asked, dryly.

"Maybe because we passed it like three thousand times."

Allan gripped the steering-wheel even tighter. "No, we haven't."

"Yes, we have."

"We're not lost, okay."

I could feel my lips pulling up at the corners. "I didn't say we were."

"I know. You implied it."

"Did I?" I leaned back in my seat, and put my feet up on the dashboard.

Allan nodded. "And maybe it wasn't the same giant rock. There could be a lot out here. You never know."

"True, true. But not all of them would say Johnny plus Sam forever."

"You don't know that."

"You're right," I said, sighing. "But one thing I know for sure is that Annie is freaking out right now."

Allan reached over and tucked a strand of hair behind my ear, like he used to do when we were little kids.

"Don't worry," he said. "We'll get there soon. I promise."

I wanted to tell him not to make promises he couldn't keep but I was tired of talking, and all I could think about was Annie, our mother's mother. Not our grandmother. She hated that word because it made her feel old. So we called her Annie, all the time, even though we were taught that it was disrespectful to call an adult by their first name. But we respected Annie. Besides our aunt Jo and uncle Ben, she was the only family we had left.

All the rest were buried in the cemetery along with our mother and father.



8 comments:

  1. LOVE LOVE LOVE this: "Store-fronts and houses have long since morphed into tall, skeletal trees, that look like brittle bones in the pale sunlight"

    And amazing last sentence.

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  2. Loved the description here, loved the sibling banter. Cute!

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  3. This read so smoothly and realistic! I liked it a lot!

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  4. Very well written and I'm immediately curious. I also love the bickering about being lost... sounds so familiar to me...except in our car it isn't usually so good natured haha

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  5. I love your writing. Always. I have not yet seen a snippet that I don't like.

    Also, YOU'RE READING JELLICOE ROAD OMG OMG OMG. Tell me how you like it! :D

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  6. Such smooth, clear, and fluid writing! You have definite skill, m'dear :)

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  7. Clem: Thanks! Your suggestion to make that the first sentence was a good one.

    MT: Yay! I was hoping I got the sibling banter right, because I'm an only child.

    Vero: Thanks!

    Kristin: This really made my day! Thanks for reading! And I finished Jellicoe Road a while back. I just haven't got around to changing the picture. I LOVED it. Very beautifully written and Jonah *squeals* Wow, that was just an awesome book.

    Melissa: Aw, thanks!

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  8. Very nicely done. I love the details and the dialogue rings true...I'm curious to see how this pans out.

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