I feel like I'm neglecting my blog...and it feels like it's going to be a while until I can write an actual blog post.

To make up for my absence, here's a teaser from something I wrote a week or so ago. It's a project that I hope to continue after my life settles down.

I'll talk about it more someday, but for now...enjoy.

I was lying in a bed of roses when my aunt found me. It took a moment for my eyes to finally unglue themselves, but when I finally got a chance to take in my surroundings I silently rejoiced, glad that I didn't wake up near a dumpster or worse, a storefront. Even so, I'd rather deal with a complete stranger, than my aunt whose glare sent shivers down my aching spine.
"Get up," she growled. "You're ruining my garden."
"I'm..." I clenched my teeth to keep from screaming, as I tried to sit up. This wasn't the first time this has happened, but it was the first time I woke up in excruciating pain. It felt like I got hit by a car or something.
"People are going to be getting up soon. Do you want them to see you like this?" I looked down at myself. Dirt was caked on my skin, along with dried blood and some sort of thick, white gunk. Then there was the fact that I was naked.
My cheeks flushed.
There was a boy who lived next door who always took out the garbage at this time of day. I should know because I watch him through the slits in my blinds every morning wishing I knew his name, wishing that he knew mine.
But right now, he doesn't even know that I exist. I'm just a girl in a room on the third floor.
A part of me wants to pass out from the pain that spiderwebs through my body, as I get to my feet. I can hear my bones rattling, my blood sizzling, the creature inside of me settling. It's growls are no more, and the soft tune that usually plays before I black out, is no more. Now, it's just me and my aunt, who is wrapping a white sheet around my shivering body.
"Next time try to wake up on the porch or better yet in the backyard, where no one can see you."
"Okay." I can't begin to count how many times I have to tell my aunt that I can't control where I wake up at. I can't even control how often I black out or for how long.
It just happens.
My legs wobble, my toes sink into the soil, the skin on the bottom of my feet burns as we move across the pavement, up the porch steps, and into the house.
Hidden from the world.
"Thanks," I said, turning toward my aunt who is looking at me with her tawny gray eyes, trying to be her usually stern self, but failing miserably. There is something strange glittering in her eyes, something that can only be called fear or better yet, worry.
My aunt is worried about me.
She has been so since I was dropped on her doorstep.
Homeless, parentless, alive.
"Yeah, sure." Her voice shakes, it quivers. She's scared. I know it. She knows but she won't admit it. "Look, don't just stand there. Go take a shower or something. You smell."
My nostrils flared. I couldn't really figure out the scent, but it did smell really bad, like I was playing in the sewer or something.
I wouldn't be surprised.
Pulling the sheet tighter around my body, I ambled towards the staircase, feeling every step I took, and every breath that left my body.
I would give anything to be a normal girl, one who had friends, one who had a boyfriend that looked just like the boy next door, one who didn't black out only to wake up in strange places.

RTW: Crazy, crazy, crazy

Road Trip Wednesday is a meme hosted by the lovely ladies over at YA Highway. Every Wednesday they post a question that can be answered on everyone's respective blogs.

This week's topic:

"The winds in Washokey make people go crazy."

This is the first sentence of the amazing Kirsten Hubbard's debut novel LIKE MANDARIN which will finally hit the shelves next year. *squee*

If you are dying to figure out why the winds in Washokey make people go crazy, then enter YA HIGHWAY's contest for your chance to win your very own copy of LIKE MANDARIN.

Now it's your turn, write about a time you did something crazy, something that blew your mind, and changed your life forever.

I have never done any life changing, crazy things in my life. Mainly because I'm not a risk-taker.

Nor, am I a person who seeks out adventure.

I don't know why that is, because my mom is always telling me that when she was my age, she used to climb trees, and go running through her backyard chasing lightning bugs and catching them in jars, so that she could watch their lights flicker on and off, on and off, until they went out.

But me, I'm scared of anything.

So, the list of all of the crazy things I've done might not actually be crazy, but they are the closest I have come to trying to it.

1. When I graduated from middle school, I got it into my head that I would audition for a performing arts school for writing - of course. To make a long story short, I didn't end up getting in, but the reason why it's possibly one of the craziest things I have done is because, like I said, I don't take risk. So when I decided to audition for this school, I tried my best to stay optimistic, I tried telling myself that even if I didn't get in it didn't necessarily mean that I wasn't a good writer, it just meant that the school wasn't the right choice for me.

2. I went camping last summer, which is really a shock even to myself because I am not an outdoors person. Well, I would be if bugs didn't like biting me up every time I walk out the door. It was really fun and I met some really nice people who I wouldn't have never met if I didn't take the risk, push aside my own personal fears, and go.

3. NaNoWriMo should be on the top of my list. When I first participated, I didn't know what I was in for, but I will seriously never forget the endless nights, the waking up to go to school tired as hell, the insecurities about my writing, the pain of wanting to edit but not being able to. It was torture. PURE torture. I was going to do it this year, got about 5K in, and realized that now is definitely not a good time for me to get caught up in writing.

So...yeah those might not be crazy, but I still got some time. Maybe I'll go hiking or get on a rollercoaster for the first time...hehe we'll see.

Jane Eyre!

Okay, there has already been so many film adaptations of Jane Eyre. My favorite is the 2006 version with Toby Stephens and Ruth Wilson. If you haven't seen that one, then please find a way to watch it because it's brilliant.

But anyways, there is a new Jane Eyre film coming out, and it's set to be released in the U.S. March 11th. *squeals*

If you don't know this already, Jane Eyre is my favorite novel of all time. A friend of my grandmother gave it to me when I turned eleven, and I guess you can say Jane Eyre was the book that got me to start writing.

I had always wanted to write a contemporary YA version of Jane, and I still do, but if you don't know already one just recently came out.

It's called Jane by April Lindner.

There is giveaway over at Angieville who is giving not one but two copies of the book!

The contest ends November 15th, which is in four days so make sure you enter if you want a chance to read Jane: http://angieville.blogspot.com/2010/11/jane-blog-tour-giveaway.html

Without farther ado, here's the trailer for the upcoming Jane Eyre movie.


Not giving up...

I am WAY behind in NaNo.

So much so that I every time I log onto my account and look at the wordcounts of all my buddies, I want to cry.

I think the only reasons I'm not doing well are:

1.) I'm super busy. Okay, I know everyone uses this excuse. But really, it's true. I have to work on my graduation project, while doing homework for other classes. Also, since I'm ambassador of my school, I spend most of my time at meetings that last for three hours. On top of that, I am apart of this after school program and this human rights and racial equality program that I'm going to later on today or in two hours.

2.) I don't know my main character. Her personality is always changing and when I started over, I found that she is way different than what I remembered. She has this I-don't-give-a-fuck attitude, and I don't even know where that came from.

3.) This is a rewrite. While I know NaNo is all about sucky first drafts. This is the second draft of my novel, and I don't want it to be too sucky or else I'll just end up back in square one.

4.) I didn't outline. But that's my own fault. I'm lazy. I don't know where to begin when it comes to outlining. I do a lot of thinking about the plot, characters etc. in my head, but when it comes to writing all of it down...no.

So there you have it. Those are the reasons why I'm sucktastic this month. I just want to get my rewrite underway so that I can edit, and (hopefully) send it off to betas in March or earlier than that if I'm lucky.

Plus, I want to query during the summer, so I have a lot to do if I want to make anything happen.

I have Thursday off from school, so I'll hopefully get to do a little more writing.


Here's another snippet from FAR FROM HERE:

Good girls ask their parents if they can go out. I don't have any parents and Margaret doesn't really give two shits about me, so hopping into a car with a boy on a school night without asking permission doesn't really make me a bad girl.

It just makes me a girl who stopped giving a fuck a long time ago.

"You ready, babe?" Cord asked, as I pulled on my seat belt, his eyes watching my every move. Not in a checking-me-out sort of way, but in a is-there-something-you're-not-telling me sort-of-way that I hated, especially when it was coming from him of all people.

"Yeah, sure," I breathed, meeting his gaze.

"Is there..." he started, and I held up my hand, catching his words, imprisoning them between my fingers.

"I'm fine." This wasn't the truth, but I have gotten so good at telling lies that it didn't really matter anymore.

"Okay," Cord said, releasing me from his icy stare. The car grew silent, as we both focused our attention on the road before us.


Teaser Tuesday

It's been a long time since I've did one of these.

So as I mentioned before, I'm participating in NaNoWriMo. This will be my third year, and hopefully my third year winning.

I got a late start because just like last year, I was unprepared, and I kept switching projects.

To make a long story short, instead of the post-apocalyptic romance, I'm working on the rewrite of my YA Contemp novel. So much for taking risks, huh?

I don't have a lot done, but here's the beginning.

"Let's do it," Cord said, pulling off his shirt. His tan muscles gleamed in the pale moonlight, and the cool summer breeze that rose up from the river made each strand of his hair dance in front of his faraway eyes.

Liv tugged at the bottom of my shirt.

"Come on, Kenny," she breathed, her voice barely a whisper.

I shook my head. Getting naked in front of a crowd of people who I barely knew was definitely not my thing. It wasn't Liv's either. But whenever she got drunk, which was every time she threw a party, she turned into a completely different person.