22.12.09

Teaser Tuesday

This is yet another snip from Playing the Field. There is a lot of swearing in this post. My MC has a dirty mouth.


***

They thought it was funny that Shelley, the good girl, the straight-A student, the President of the tenth grade, had a baby. She was a chubby-faced red head who liked reading Manga and watching reruns of The Golden Girls and yet-she lost her virginity to only God knows who and became pregnant and was now a mother.

Yeah, it was all so very funny. So funny, that I forgot to laugh.

I held my breath, as we made our way to the double doors that led to the football field. A golden light streamed in through the window, illuminating the table that sat right in front of our escape route.

Guys who couldn't keep their dicks in their pants wanted to sit at this table. Girls who were jealous-hearted, but eager to be apart of the in-crowd wanted to sit at this table. It seemed like everyone in this school wanted to sit at this table. Everyone except me and Marnie and anyone else who hated the Lipsticks.

Teachers and parents thought they were angels. Anyone who couldn't look past their plastic smiles, their pretty faces, and their large trust funds, thought they were goddesses. The bright sunlight streaming in through the window made them seem celestial, but looks could be deceiving.

They are deceiving.

The Lipsticks were demons sent from my own personal Hell. I could feel my free hand curling into a fist as we moved past them.

"Stop looking at them," Marnie ordered, but I couldn't help it. I wanted my glare to incinerate if not all three of them, then just one.

Carmen Rivera.

She was checking her lipstick in the mirror, when one of her flunkies said something to her. Kaitlin. I never really talked to her, but I could tell she was another Carmen. She dressed like her, sat the same way as her, and even had her hair clipped back like her. She used to be a blond and now her hair was a dark, chocolate brown. Just like Carmen's.

It was amazing what one girl could do to a school. Carmen had everyone wrapped around her little, manicured finger. Everyone except me.

She looked up and around at me. Her gaze was just as sharp. A smirk twisted up her full pink lips, and then she scooted out from the table and stood up.

Smoothing out her short, short skirt, she moved towards us.

"Come on," Marnie said.

"You can go on. I just want to talk to her."

Marnie turned to stone at my side, "Why the fuck do you want to talk to that bitch?"

"I want to hear what she has to say for herself."

"You think she told?"

I didn't answer her. She took that as a yes.

A strong floral scent filled my nose as Carmen stopped a few inches in front of me. She folded her arms across her chest, and turned her head, so that a long strand of hair was flicked out of her eyes.

"Hello, Darcy." Even her voice was obnoxiously sweet.

"Carmen," I said, bitterly.

13 comments:

  1. This voice really stood out for me. It's daringly honest and it makes me really like your MC, Darcy.
    And this line -"Yeah, it was all so very funny. So funny, that I forgot to laugh"-- really stuck with me.

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  2. Hehe I just read this! Loved it then, love it now :)

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  3. I agree with Bee! The voice really stood out. It was raw, honest and it realistic.

    I loved your MC's inner thoughts, it made really interested in him.

    Great teaser!

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  5. I LOVE your descriptions of the "in crowd" here-- how they're sitting in golden light, how deceptive they are. And your voice is so strong! Great tease.

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  6. Your voice is very strong and I loved your opening. It really draws the reader in. Now I'm curious what it has to do with the rest and what she's going to talk to Carmen about. Great tease and I love your blog. :)

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  7. Wow, this is really interesting and dark and contemp, right up my alley! I'm also curious about the girl mentioned in the beginning.

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  8. Loved it! Your MC's voice is strong, sarcastic and unique. And your descriptions come through very clearly as hers, if you know what I mean. :)

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  9. Such a strong voice! Love your MC!

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  10. Greeat voice, I already like your MC :)And I love the label you give to the in-crowd. The Lipsticks, very awesome :)

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  11. The voice just stands out so, so strongly. Amazing :D <3 your MC :)

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  12. "It was so funny I forgot to laugh" I haven't heard this in forever. Very strong voice. I already don't like Carmen.

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  13. I loved this. The first paragraph is so revealing -- not of the girl in question, but more so of everyone else. Especially when you add in the line about it was so funny you forgot to laugh. I really, really like your writing style.

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